A GRAND SLAM HOMER(pun intended)

[T***@aol.com]

Earlier tonight I walked down to USF and hopped onto
MIB(where I almost reached 500,000 points!), then slipped into the
line for the new Simpsons Ride, which is touted by the Sentinel as
being "open," but is still in its "Technical Rehearsal" period. This
has been going on since last Wednesday, but apparently nobody in the
park knew exactly what its status is. Typical.
What isn't typical is the ride. It is, if you pardon the
languarge,
UNBEFUCKINGLIEVABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Uni now has TWO "F" Ticket Rides!!! If you ever visit USF and don't
ride The Simpsons you should have a lobotomy.
I don't want to ruin anything for those who haven't ridden it
yet, which is probably everything reading this. All I'll say is that
it will exceed ALL your expectations. Universal has really hit one out
of the park, all the way out of the solar system. Diz will REALLY have
a hard act to follow with Toy Story Mania.
Anyone who liked the old Hanna Barbera ride will feel quite
happy with The Simpsons, for much of the format is similar.

[9Lanterns]

"All I'll say is that
it will exceed ALL your expectations. Universal has really hit one
out
of the park, all the way out of the solar system. Diz will REALLY
have
a hard act to follow with Toy Story Mania."

Since my expectation is essentially zilch, I bet they'll have no
problem exceeding it. But to be fair, I have heard good things about
the Simpsons ride from other sources. BTTF was simply not a very good
ride, so I'm sure this will be an improvement. but we're still
talking simulator here. I don't know how you can claim F-ticket
though. In fact, I'm racking my brain trying to come up with what you
think is the other F-ticket at USF. Unless you meant the resort as a
whole, and consider Spidey an F-ticket. But as a side note, Spidey
has NOT aged well at all. It's still good, but it lacks the timeless
quality that infuses much of the Disney stuff. Part of that is Uni
maintenance's fault, as the queue is just trashed and dirty and looks
horrible. Part of that is that the film-based stuff will never be
timeless. Technology surpasses it too quickly.

As to TSM, I will be riding either Friday night or Saturday morning,
and I'd be surprised if Denise didn't beat me to it. I'm sure TSM
will be fun, but my expectations have also been lowered for that one.
One thing is for sure, regardless of which is better, TSM is
DESTROYING the Simpsons in terms of marketing. This Simpsons makeover
is barely on anyone's radar, from what I can tell. But TSM is mega-
hyped. It is going to be jam-packed with people all day long. I
doubt anyone will be able to say the same for Simpsons.

-Shane

[t***@aol.com]

Does anyone, even HARD CORE Uni zombies really think Spiderman is an
"F" ticket at this point. Teh bloom is WAY off that rose baby.

It is a solid, very, very good ride, the best Uni has by a mile. Byt
man, to call it an "F" ticket is just a joke. To me an attraction
needs to be timeless (which as Shane has pointed out Spidey certainly
is not) and also has to be supported by an incredible setting (which
Spidey is FAR, FAR, FAR from having to even be considered anything
CLOSE to an "E" ticket so much the "F" ticket nonsense.

I think Trav get's caught up in the newness thing a little too much...
gets to his head. Plus, one nice thing about Uni rides (for me at
least) is that because I do not follow them closely they often come as
a surprise. The DIsney stuff I know too much about going in, have
seen the track layouts and the videos and all of that so by the time I
ride I am never surprised... which diminishes the experience.

So here is hoping that the Simpson's (a truly GREAT show) ride is
anything close to that Trav thinks it is... I will be happy if it is
simply better than the pure crap that BTTF was.

[T***@aol.com]

Post by t***@aol.com
Does anyone, even HARD CORE Uni zombies really think Spiderman is an
"F" ticket at this point. �Teh bloom is WAY off that rose baby.

Spidey has everything you'd want in a ride. Even when some
of the effects are broken, it delivers!

Post by t***@aol.com
So here is hoping that the Simpson's �(a truly GREAT show) ride is
anything close to that Trav thinks it is... I will be happy if it is
simply better than the pure crap that BTTF was.

BTTF was one of Uni's better attractions. But, its
successor will be far, far more popular. And, like Maggie, it will
never age.

[t***@aol.com]

OK, I just checked out a video of the Simpson's ride. Yes, a video
cannot do it justice, yes, there are some clever parts, but man, this
is looking like a nice C ticket... forget about E ticket and F
ticket... someone is on some crack.

[t***@aol.com]

Well, I watched the video a few more times and I have to say, I pretty
much HATE this thing.

It has that frantic, charmless spin that only Uni can put on an
attraction. Very much like Spiderman pacing actually in which it is
just going from one near death situation right into the next. No
pacing at all, no story at all and no sense of wonder at all... just
full on frontal assault. Now I know some people (apparently Trav)
like this feel but I just don't. Storm Rider at TDS has some of this
feeling but it is handled better in the overall context of the story
and with much better pacing. The Simpson's ride just goes from 1 to
100 in like a millisecond, then stays there the entire time. You
can't have light without dark and you can't have action without some
calm.

So far Trav is the only person I have read who likes this.

[T***@aol.com]

BTTF was simply not a very good ride, so I'm sure this will be an improvement. �but we're still talking simulator here.

Oh, come on! It was marvelous, though quite bumpy. It delivered
just what a fan of the movie would want.

�I don't know how you can claim F-ticket though. �In fact, I'm racking my brain trying to come up with what you think is the other F-ticket at USF. �

I meant for all of the complex. They now have one in each park,
a nice balance.

Spidey has NOT aged well at all. �It's still good, but it lacks the timeless
quality that infuses much of the Disney stuff. �Part of that is Uni
maintenance's fault, as the queue is just trashed and dirty and looks
horrible. �Part of that is that the film-based stuff will never be
timeless. Technology surpasses it too quickly.

Spidey remains the best thing Uni has ever, or will ever,
do. I grant that the queue is always dirty and the exhibits in the
newsroom always need paint. (I've always wondered why the whole room
isn't in b&w. Why color on the monitors?)

As to TSM, I will be riding either Friday night or Saturday morning,
and I'd be surprised if Denise didn't beat me to it. �

I'll be one of the APers this weekend!

One thing is for sure, regardless of which is better, TSM is DESTROYING the Simpsons in terms of marketing. �This Simpsons makeover is barely on anyone's radar, from what I can tell. �But TSM is mega- hyped. �It is going to be jam-packed with people all day long. �I doubt anyone will be able to say the same for Simpsons.

I haven't seen ANY ads or promotions for TSM. However, TV
and print ads for The Simpsons have been running since early Monday
morning, especially during the nightly double episode block on the Fox
station. This confused me, for the AP dept at the Studios didn't know
when the attraction would be opening. Yet, on Tueaday morning, the
headline in The Sentinel was all about it being open. When I actually
rode it later that day, the staff told me it was running in TR since
last Wednesday. As I said, typical for Uni.

[P***@aol.com]

<You
can't have light without dark and you can't have action without some
calm.

Teev, this is just so deep I just had to comment.

I think my main interest in Universal is that it isn't Disney, and if
you slap the two side by side it gives a better appreciation of the
craft behind Disney parks. Universal on the other hand has a niche
appeal in stuff like Horror Nights, which are so well done and will
never be attempted by Disney.

Trav, I imagine you are probably a big Simpsons fan and this is
probably partly responsible for your reaction to the new attraction.
Although I look forward to seeing it I have more hope for Toy Story
Mania, because I expect to see new technology., and greater
repeatability. It has GOT to be better than Buzz Lightyear.......a
Disney ride I put into the shameful category of the filthy Spiderman
queue........if only for the Randy Newman music.

[t***@aol.com]

Not trying to be deep or anything Petey.... though I see how it
sounded that way.

It's just that you really do need contrast in order to tell a story
whether visually or verbally. If it is just all out balls to the wall
crap it simply becomes a mess, a headache. There is no nuance or
pacing. The Simpson's ride is just one of the loud, un-focused messes
that reminds me a lot of the early 90's Vegas attractions they toyed
with, virtually all of which have since failed.
Disney is certainly capable of falling into this trap as well though
Uni has refined it to an art form, a very bad an annoying art but they
are the masters of it nonetheless.

Spiderman is also guilty of this but Spiderman has a certain
technology wow factor (at least it did, not so much any longer) which
earns it a bit of a pass when it comes to the rest of the ride. But
the Simpson's ride is built upon poor 20 year old technology, it is
just a very bad mix.

Meanwhile look at Soar'n, a ride in many ways similar to the Simpson's
in terms of tech and one which is MASSIVELY popular and i think will
continue to be. It could and frankly should be better than it
currently is but it proves that not every ride has to be a loud in
your face mess.

[R***@aol.com]

Our studio did a couple minutes of the ride film. I actually did a
little bit o animation towards the end of the ride with Maggie,
Sideshow Bob and the panda. I too watched the grainy, shakey video on
YouTube...(watched the nice crisp version we have here...lots of fun
theme park jokes) I think it looks fun. I read a couple reviews from
people who have riden and folks seem to dig it. I'm looking forward
to checking it out...

www.raymation.net

[t***@aol.com]

Point taken Ray that a shaky You-Tube video is no substitute for the
real deal... but to be fair I have seen a nice high quality DVD of it
as well. I think that even without the motion you get an incredibly
good sense of what this thing is about and I happen to hate it. I
have ZERO problem with the animation though, and I love the Simpson's,
it's just loud, poorly paced rides based on old technology that I am
not so fond of... (Body Wars anyone?)

[T***@aol.com]

I love the Simpson's, it's just loud, poorly paced rides based on old >technology that I amv not so fond of... (Body Wars anyone?)

So, I guess you hate roller coasters, too, which have been
around for over a CENTURY. Even the tubular steel coaster concept
dates back to the Matterhorn, which opened in 1959.
Sorry, Teev, you walked right into that one.

[t***@aol.com]

Well actually Trav I am NOT a coaster fan... at least not in the
traditional sense.

Now I don't HATE them, I just find them boring for the most part.
Very simplistic and one note. In fact the coasters that I tend to
actually enjoy are almost often slower but highly themed ones... the
Big Thunders and so on. This is for much the same reason I do not
like bombasitc stuff like the the Simpson's ride. Now to be fair
coasters in general do not claim to be immersive themed
experiences.... if they do (Everest for example) I judge them on THAT
criteria (just as I do the Simpson's). Otherwise coasters are simple
carnival rides and cannot be held to the same measures as something
aiming to be more.

[9Lanterns]

Post by t***@aol.com
Well actually Trav I am NOT a coaster fan... at least not in the
traditional sense.

Nice try, Teev, my friend, but I'm sorry to say, you walked right into
it! You can try to weasle out of it all you want, but you got smoked,
baby! Killed by your own words. And on a public internet message
board, no less. How embarassing for you!

-Shane

[t***@aol.com]

You got me Shane... all five of us must think I am an idiot....

Walked right into that trap.

[9Lanterns]

Post by t***@aol.com
You got me Shane... all five of us must think I am an idiot....
Walked right into that trap.

Yeah, it's down to me, you, Petey, Ray, and Trav.

But since it's you guys, I have to share this, because no one else I
know will even remotely care... There's this Goofy Mystery Tour thing
that they hold at DHS once a year. It's a CM-only puzzle-hunt/trivia
race thing. Lasts about 4 hours (after DHS closes). You get 50
trivia questions, and then 15 separate puzzle/clues that take you
around Sunset and Hollywood Blvd to different stations. At each
station, if you solve the puzzle you get a letter. At the end, if
you've collected all the letters, you unscramble the final answer.
The team who unscrambles the final answer and has the most points wins
the race.

So as a CM spouse, I'm eligible to participate in this thing, right?
I teamed up with my wife, brother, and sister (all CMs). And I figure
we have a decent shot to be competitive. Well right out of the gate
is the trivia thing. 50 questions about ANYTHING Disney that have all
been certified by Dave Smith. About 25-30 were park related, and the
rest were just random things. And we're just KILLING these. I'm
thinking back to when Teev and I used to play whole games of Disney
Trivial Pursuit online against each other.

And then the puzzle stuff starts. And these are NOT easy puzzles,
they are very involved, multi-stage things that you have to solve.
And then you have to go track down the costumed-characters in the park
and perform the task or say the secret phrase or whatever. Most
people don't even come CLOSE to finishing all 15 puzzles in the barely
2 hours you have for this part. You can burn 3 hint tickets, but they
cost you 10 points each.

We get hung up on this wicked hard puzzle involving the Olympic rings,
and we blow like 15-20 minutes on this single puzzle (our second of
the night). So we are just at warp speed trying to fly through
these. At last we finish them all with about 10 minutes to go, so we
start in on unscrambling the word. About 5 minutes in, my wife spots
the word "CASPIAN", so we think that's got to be it. Trouble is, we
can't make the rest of the letters make any sense. So we turn in our
answer as "DIMMOUTH CASPIAN", knowing it's wrong, but we're flat out
of time and hoping against hope that maybe Caspian has some ridiculous
obscure first name.

So of course we're wrong. The answer was CHAMPION STADIUM, it's an
Olympic theme this year, so we're kicking ourselves. They tell us
that 21 out of about 190 teams actually solved the word scramble,
which you HAVE to do in order to win. So we're bummed, but we did
alright for our first time out.

But get this: they post the total scores today. There's a 1000
possible points. 50 points for each puzzle, 5 points for each trivia
question. No points for solving the final scramble, but as I said,
that's required to win.

And we're at the top of the friggin board! 970 points! We missed 6
lousy trivia questions (tied with one other team for highest trivia
score on the board). We were also one of only 4 teams to complete all
the puzzles without burning hints. The team that actually won the
whole thing finished 10 points behind us!

So I just had to share that. I feel like we won all our regular
season games and got robbed in the super bowl! Curse you, Prince
Caspian!

-Shane

[P***@aol.com]

So where IS the Caspian name from...........Narnia?

I have never liked Narnia.

Good going on your trivia challenge. You are ready for Survivor now.

[t***@aol.com]

Congratulations my man.... we need to start hose trivia games again.
INCREDIBLY geeky and yet fun.

What does the winner get?

[9Lanterns]

Post by t***@aol.com
Congratulations my man.... we need to start hose trivia games again.
INCREDIBLY geeky and yet fun.
What does the winner get?

Nothing really. they gave medals and bouquets to the top 3 teams, but
I think they did that just because it's an Olympic theme. If they
gave out anything real, I didn't see it. Maybe they scored some free
extra passes or something.

Oh yes, those trivia games were insanely geeky, but we were playing at
the highest level, my man! How many other Disney freaks out there can
compete? we have to be among the top players in the world! I still
hold a grudge about that one question that asked how Old Yeller caught
Rabies. I said wolves, the card said pigs. It was wolves, baby! The
card was wrong! "Sorry, the answer is Moops."

-Shane

[t***@aol.com]

Bubble Boy... nice.... the card is king.